This is why I don't believe in coincidences

I used to think that believing was such mumbo-jumbo, something Disney movies were trying to perpetuate and a way for parents to keep their kids innocent and naive. But after everything, I finally get it. I finally understand. The truth that I've been chasing after, always at the tip of my conscious but never fully there, is finally mine. The hilarious part is I don't even know how to describe it. I can't even put a name to it. Words are not enough to encapsulate what this is.

But of course, as a human fallacy, I will try.

Here it is: Believing, having faith, hoping, willing things to be. It's all true. And no matter how much of every fiber of my being will try to get you (whoever you are) to actually believe me, it won't matter, because until you reach that point, of complete assurance, where no doubts linger, you will never believe in believing. It's a circle. To believe in having faith, you must have faith, but to have faith, you must believe.

Everything is neither, and yet of both. I'm here but not here. Sometimes, when I'm in class or amid a crowd of people, I'll distance myself out and realize none of this is significant, that I'm on my own, and not. It reminds me that this materialistic world is worthless, that I should not rely on it so much; however, it does not mean it doesn't affect me. On the contrary, it too is another circle; everything is interconnected, interlocked with each other. I cannot separate entities, ideas, and events. It's one magnificently woven tapestry, where every detail causes and is caused by another detail.

And I anticipate the day you become my detail.